I have to be honest. This week has sucked. Last night I could feel the pull of the whirlpool of negativity grasping at my legs and I was too tired to fight it. For most of the evening I had a scowl on my face that I tried to keep on the inside since my stepchildren were over. It’s rare that I get into that bad of shape since I’m an optimistic person by nature but like I said, this week has sucked. The voice of the Inner Critic was loud with messages of fear, anger, grief, fear, anger, grief. Like most everyone else in this country I had some really bad financial news. And that was only one of the crappy things that has happened within the last four days.
But last night my youngest stepdaughter impulsively came in and gave me a hug. “You’re the best stepmom anybody could have,” she said. ”I’m so glad Dad married you.” And a few minutes later, “I’m so happy you’re my stepmom and I have a little sister now.”
Out of the mouth of babes, right? This girl is 8 and she is one of the most intuitive people I’ve ever met. When she was three if I was in a bad mood but had a smile plastered on my face, she would walk over to me and start petting my hand. She wouldn’t say anything, but she somehow knew that I was a human being in need of comfort.
Her hug and words of appreciation helped me climb out of the spiral. After she went to bed I made a list of all the really wonderful things that have happened this week. I was asked to teach at my favorite place in the world: The Loft Literary Center. I found the perfect location to hold the Smackdown the Inner Critic Workshop (More on this later!). My daughter held my hand while she fell asleep. My husband volunteered to take this Friday off so I can work while he watches the baby. My stepdaughter hugged me.
It’s a complex world. We can feel happy and sad, angry and appreciative all at the same time about the same thing. So if you’re feeling like sh*& this week, what is the flip side? What good things have happened, too?
